Episode 86 - My Husband Cheated – And the Lies Just Kept Coming!
Suzie : Welcome to sharing my truth with Mel and Suzie. The uncensored version where we bear it all.
Mel: We do 1234.
Suzie : And we're back, back. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to sharing my truth pod. And you're here with Mel and Susie. And we're here to say, give this cute little podcast five star review. And you can also go to our socials at sharingmytruthpod. And you can follow us, TikTok, Instagram, the YouTubes, where you can actually watch these podcasts if you're not already watching us right now. I see you. Yeah, we would love to see you there. Comment and tell us all about your stuff. You can go to sharingmytruth.com and you can go there. You can leave us a voicemail, you can send us an email, send us a DM, whatever you want to do. Share your truth with us.
Mel: Do that.
Suzie : Funny. Not funny. Sexy. Not sexy. We'll hear it all.
Mel: We will. Hey, babes. Hello, darling.
Suzie : How are you?
Mel: As always, I'm fabulous.
Suzie : Good. That's important.
Mel: Everything's good.
Suzie : I mean, you know, you're looking tan, girl.
Mel: Well, hot.
Suzie : Mel. Summer.
Mel: It's faded a bit. I was a bit more tan.
Suzie : I feel like my tan in Canada fades so fast.
Mel: It does. And I wear, like, factor 50 all the time. Cause I don't want to get skincare.
Suzie : Factor fifty's that sunscreen?
Mel: Yeah.
Suzie : Amazing.
Mel: I mean, I, sometimes when I'm a very tan, I'll go down to a 30.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: But I know I don't like fry and I don't sit there all day.
Suzie : See, I'm dumb and I love, I'm like a sun worshiper. Like, I just love sitting out there. Well, you're young, schwitzing and.
Mel: But my, the mic's gone.
Suzie : Microphone really got.
Mel: My husband's like the anti sunbade. They're like, max, he'll like, sit down. And then he always has to read something. He can't just sit there. And then he sits and then he's like, okay, I'm hot. Then he gets up and he walks away and that's that. I mean, he literally can't do it. But he's a ******* because he gets tanned in about 20 nanoseconds.
Suzie : He's so tanned. I'm like, what?
Mel: Oh, and that's not even, that's not even right.
Suzie : I'm thinking about his. Wider.
Mel: Yeah, exactly. He gets so tanned, it's ridiculous. And the back of his neck is so tanned. And then he'll never, I've told him he has to wear the little Speedos. Yes. No, I'm kidding. And in England we call them a budgie smuggler.
Suzie : Ew. What is that? Disgusting. Do you put a budgie in there? Is that where it came from?
Mel: I have no idea. I actually have never heard him there. Thought too much. Why we call them like that. That's disgusting.
Suzie : That's horrible.
Mel: But anyway, they're so unattractive, but you won't get the cause. So he's got the lines of.
Suzie : I do, honestly, if I can just be honest.
Mel: Oh, yeah.
Suzie : Okay. Like little ones where they're like shorts. Not like the speedo speedos, but like the little tight shorts that guys wear. I love it. Like old, like, what is it? Like, seventies James Bond would wear them. So hot.
Mel: Really?
Suzie : Yeah. If you're like, hot and you're wearing that, I can just see the outline of you always.
Mel: Oh, you would have liked a lot of men in Spain then.
Suzie : Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mel: I think you'd like it.
Suzie : They'd like me.
Mel: I think they would.
Suzie : Them topless beaches coming.
Mel: I think you'd be completely fine. I'm like, I'll leave you here for the day. I'll see you later.
Suzie : Yeah, literally, I'll see you for dinner. Pregnant, five minutes later. Disgusting. Okay, well, what are we talking about today, mo?
Mel: Well, on the subject of people writing in. People do write in to us.
Suzie : Yes, they do.
Mel: And we have a write in. And it's about. We talk about cheating a lot because everyone wants to talk about it. Why does everyone talk about it?
Suzie : Because people are fascinated by cheating. Because either they are cheating themselves, they've been cheated on, or they're thinking about it.
Mel: Yeah.
Suzie : Yes.
Mel: Or they think, like, we've had discussion about me. If you're happy, we don't believe you. And somebody must be cheating.
Suzie : The amount of people, and let's just get this clear, the amount of people that ask me about your relationship, and they're like, mel's crazy, right? Like, obviously, like. And I'm like, you're crazy people.
Mel: Some people are just happy. I know. Isn't it funny?
Suzie : It's actually ****** up.
Mel: Yeah. They think it's horrifying. It's cheating to me.
Suzie : Or they're just like, no, they must have some kind. And I'm like, literally no swingers.
Mel: Yes, I'd like to state I'm here. Not a swing. Nothing.
Suzie : Not everyone thinks like me. Not everyone thinks like you, sir. Melanie and her husband are very happy. Yeah, it's just the funniest thing ever.
Mel: But anyway. Yeah, they can't believe it. Anyway, so this is cheating again, but it's cheating from another angle, I think.
Suzie : Okay.
Mel: Okay. So this woman has written into us. So she said, my husband had an affair two years ago, but he ended it when she pushed him to leave me. As awful as it's been, I've held onto the fact that he chose me over her and moved on. However, during an argument, he let it slip that she ended it as she didn't want to leave her husband.
Suzie : Right.
Mel: So he manufactured a story. Great. I felt so betrayed. I've thrown him out and I want a divorce. Everyone thinks I'm overreacting, especially my family.
Suzie : I don't think she's overreacting.
Mel: No, because he lied again.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Yeah, but I think. So my initial thing, when I first read this story that this person wrote in to us is that I thought, isn't it weird that you're thinking it's okay because he chose you, which is like a really sort of female thing. It's like, he cheated, and that's bad, but he chose me in the end, so it's okay. So that was my first thing. I just like, have we. We've forgotten the bit that he cheated. But then, I mean, you're just like, that's absurd. Like, you know. And then. And then. Yeah, so then, then, in actual fact, that was all bollocks. And he lied again. Yeah. She's not overreacting. I mean, ******* hell. I wouldn't even got to the second bit, let alone the first bit. I'd have been like, that's it. You're off anyway, right? So I wouldn't even got to letting him stay. But for her family, to all her friends, to say, you're overreacting. Like, **** you.
Suzie : Yeah, that's the weirdest part about this, is that he's lied twice.
Mel: Yeah.
Suzie : Like, why do you want her to stay with this guy who has cheated on her, which he admits, but now has actually not chosen her, but wanted to choose the other woman. But the other woman didn't want to choose him. That means nobody wants your husband, honey.
Mel: It's like. And he doesn't. And the thing that you were holding onto that was keeping you going was that he'd chosen you is actually not the truth. So not only did he lie about that, he then didn't want you in the end. So the reason you stay with him is false.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Is like a lie. And people are wondering why you're angry. It's so weird. What is wrong with people?
Suzie : I don't know. Because, I mean, Kay. Let's just say. Cause we have no facts related to the story. No, we have what she's telling us. But obviously. So this guy cheated on her. And maybe it obviously was emotional because he wanted to leave his wife for her. So it's like.
Mel: It's the worst.
Suzie : Yeah, exactly. It's not just like a physical. It's the worst. It's a literal emotional affair. And that's. You can't get over those.
Mel: No, it's very hard to. I don't think you can. Because the biggest portrayal, in my mind is the ick factor of somebody touching somebody else and then coming to you is like. But the. That's just megaric for me. So that's one thing.
Suzie : Right.
Mel: The actual fact that you've basically fallen in love with somebody else, which, in order to fall in love with somebody else, you've either slightly fallen out with you or you've totally fallen out.
Suzie : Right.
Mel: Right. That is the biggest betrayal. Emotional betrayal, actually is bigger than physical betrayal. Because physical stuff. Although I'm not saying I'd live by this at all, because I'm being a bit of a hypocrite here, but I still think that physical betrayal is so easy to do.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Because you're taken over in the moment and you're, you know, probably if you're drunk or whatever it is, you know, you're just taken over in the moment. And there's no logic. There's no thinking about this. It's what your body actually is needing.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Whereas emotional. You've thought about this.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: There's some thought that's gone into loving somebody. It's a whole process. So it's a way bigger thing that, oh, my God, you ****** this person. And that's the fact that now you're ****** in love with them. It's the end. The end of the end.
Suzie : I just feel like it's hard. Like, why is he. Why did he go back with. That's what I hate about, like, I feel like a lot of guys do this where they want to leave their wives and they want kind of that excuse to go out and, like, be with someone else, kind of. And it's a lot. It's actually very easy for guys to do this. Cause women find men who have lives more attractive for some reason. We've talked about this before. For whatever reason, women are ****** up like this. And we love a man in a relationship, but men will just be like, oh, well, that didn't work out, so I'll just go back to my ***** wife not actually, since she's a *****, but just like, you know, go back to unhappy, unhappy marriage and it's like. And then just like, wait until the next one, like, of course she shouldn't trust him after this.
Mel: No way. I mean, I don't see how there's any comeback. I mean, I think a lot of men do it because I know there's some statistics which I don't have to hand, but men like being married. They like, or they like being in relationships because they like the woman taking care of them. It's not the sex thing is one thing and that, all of that. But there's a sort of taking care of you aspect that a lot of women do. And not necessarily, I'm not talking about cooking and whatever, but there is an element of that nurturing thing that women do. And if you like that, you don't want to be alone, so you'll go back to something that you aren't happy with, to not be alone, which is, to me, completely mad because it's also really kind of cruel because you're stopping her from living her life, you know, if you don't want her. And I, you know, how do you do this in a nice way? I don't think there's any way to break up with somebody in a nice way, but I think you can do it in an honest way at the very least. And sort of, you know, break up. It's not right. You break up, you can't. Breaking up's a horrible thing, and a marriage is another thing. And if you have children, oh, my God, it's very, very complicated to unravel that, but, oh, my God, to actually have chosen the other woman and then she didn't choose you. And then to lie and stay with your wife and say, well, I did actually choose you. I mean, what an absolute ******* *******. I mean, I don't know how I understand marriage staying together, because it's very hard to unwind marriage unless you're deeply miserable. It's very difficult. But I don't know how you could be in the same room with a man like that. I mean, I honestly don't know how you could trust anything he says about anything.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: And this is the person you're sharing your life with. And I don't care if you, let's say, have your money in different bank accounts, you live in the same house, you sort of buy, you know, you. You share the same bed, the same bathroom, the same. I mean, Christ alive, I don't know. I think. I think I really. I'm really sorry for you. I'm really sorry that he found the need to be this cruel. It is one thing to cheat, and we know I don't love that, but I'm not. I'm a realist. I do understand why that. Obviously, and I've said this many times, obviously it happens because people are unhappy and people need things. And of course, that's why people cheat and they get into circumstances and it overtakes them and blah, blah, blah. And you've fallen in love with somebody. You also can't stop that. As horrible that is and as cruel as that is to the other person, you can't stop yourself from feeling, but to them, ****** lie. That's cruel.
Suzie : I know. I feel like from thinking about this a little bit and looking at her friends and family's position on this, it's like they probably think she was dumb to stay with him the first time. Do you know what I mean? Or just like, where they thought that she was like, okay, well, he was gonna. He wanted to choose. He didn't wanna leave me, so it's fine. And they're probably like, okay, sure, whatever you say.
Mel: Let's make you know.
Suzie : And then when he's like, okay, no, obviously this came out where he wasn't gonna choose her. They're probably like, well, you stayed with him anyways and so now you have this whole thing. So it's like, he was lying anyways. He was having an affair.
Mel: So it's like, yeah, it's like, you.
Suzie : Really gotta leave him now. Now with the final straw. It's kind of crazy where it's like.
Mel: Yeah, the intricacies, like they're thinking they're hung up on cheating bit.
Suzie : Yes.
Mel: And she didn't leave him for cheating.
Suzie : And now she's leaving for lying. Yeah. If that makes sense.
Mel: Yeah, well, like making it even worse.
Suzie : Right.
Mel: Because people do make mistakes. They do. Of course, I'm not saying I could deal with it, because I couldn't. I couldn't handle it. But I do understand and I really think it's totally personal to the relationship, to the people. And everyone else should butt out unless somebody is abusive. If somebody has had an affair and they're able to surmount it, that is really their business. It's got nothing to do with you. And you shouldn't. Unless there's a history of abuse or some horrible, toxic **** or whatever, you should keep your nose out. But this is something else. I mean, he's like lying. And I think that's just so mean to say I chose you because as women, that is important to us. Yeah, I think it's really important. It validates us. It makes us feel good about ourselves. You know, this man chose me and then actually he didn't.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: I don't even know what you do with that in your head. Yeah, I think it's horrible. I think it's horrible. I. You have a lot of courage to write about it. I'm really sorry that somebody's done this. And I think you really should think about, you know, do you actually know him?
Suzie : Apparently not. And it doesn't sound like she has.
Mel: Maybe children, so, like, didn't mention children.
Suzie : So, like, it's a much easier thing to get out of this now.
Mel: 100 if you don't have kids. It is easy.
Suzie : She said was her husband, though. Yeah, so she's married. I mean, so it's like if you are going to have a husband, it's like obviously you can't. It's not an easy break. But are you gonna be able to spend the rest of your life with this person? Probably not, it sounds like.
Mel: But yeah, because she also said it happened two years ago, so he's been lying for an awfully long time.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: And that is always.
Suzie : And he could be having another affair too.
Mel: Oh, my God.
Suzie : And it sounds like they're arguing, which is why it came out like this is like this relationship. I'm sorry, Bubbie, but it is.
Mel: Sorry, Bubby.
Suzie : Bubby.
Mel: Sorry again. Yeah, I mean, look, I'm not going to tell anybody what to do because I think that's very difficult. But my advice would be really think about, who is this man? Who is he? Why has he got that little respect for you? That he's okay, he's cheating on you. That's really horrible. But he's lied about it.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: And he's lied about the reason to make himself basically to get himself out of a bind.
Suzie : Exactly.
Mel: I mean, he's, you know. So I really think you should think about that. He didn't have the balls to tell you the truth.
Suzie : Exactly.
Mel: Who is hedgesthem? Like, who is he? And do you want to be with somebody like that?
Suzie : Exactly.
Mel: And your family is not being very supportive. Just remind myself if she said so. She said, everyone thinks I'm overreacting, especially my family.
Suzie : Right.
Mel: So her friends too. I mean, ******* hell. Thanks. Mates.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: You know, and I mean, it's possible. I know, as friends. Sometimes you have friends like this, they go on and on about it. You're just like, oh, God. Okay. You know, you're sick of hearing about it, but, like, come on. She's having a really existential crisis in her life, and I think you should support her in whatever she needs to do.
Suzie : Yeah. I mean, it's like, he didn't. He didn't break up with you. He wanted to leave you for another woman, but then after the fact, he didn't even break up with you, and.
Mel: But she. The other. The affair.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Woman didn't want to leave her. Didn't want to leave her husband for him, so he had to, basically. Your seconds.
Suzie : Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mel: And I'm not sure I would have rather him just break up with me 100%. I don't know how I would have dealt with that. Like, you're second best. Great. Thanks for having me.
Suzie : Absolutely not.
Mel: Like, **** off.
Suzie : Could never deal with that. And I'm like, yo, if this was not right, that's great. I'm so happy we figured this out now, than we are in, like, ten years from now. And this is only two years down the line of you knowing that this has happened.
Mel: Yeah.
Suzie : So you're still in the early stages, hopefully, of being able to get out.
Mel: Of whatever this is. I mean, this is betrayal. And I think it's very cruel of him. I really do. But I also understand getting out of a marriage. It's not easy. It's very different. I mean, getting out of a marriage or getting out of living with somebody where you share a house and you share all sorts of things and finances and who knows what? It's very, very complicated. And all of that can become incredibly overwhelming, and that's what keeps people where they are not changing things.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: But, you know, I really would ask you to ask yourself, like, who is this man you're married, you're sharing your life with?
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: You share your life with somebody because they add something. You know, I say to people, you should be happy, and you're with somebody, it makes you happy. It doesn't make you happy. A person can't give you happiness. You have to be happy, and it makes it better. But sharing your life should be a gift, not a thing around your neck. And, you know.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: Which. That's what this sounds like. Sounds horrendous.
Suzie : And it's like, if you do, like, let's just say you do want this relationship to work and you are in love with him, and he says he's sorry and you. But let's just say you want him to work. I think you have to go see a couple's counselor and just figuring it out. Having someone who has, like, no bias. Don't talk to your friends and family about this anymore, because they obviously do not are. They're not looking about the best of, like, the situation, I don't think, in my opinion, I think you have to go to someone who's completely unrelated and, like, asking for their professional opinion. And if your husband's not willing to do that, then that's it.
Mel: Yeah.
Suzie : You know what I mean? Like, if he's not willing to figure out his own problems. Cause obviously this man has problems about the relationship and whatever else is happening in both of your lives. Like, you need to go see someone who's able to maybe get you through this horrible, horrible time in the relationship. And if you do want this to work and it's really, this relationship is really important to you, and you don't think you want to give it up, although I personally would, then, yeah, you have to go see a professional.
Mel: Professional counselor. Yeah. I think getting some outflight advice definitely could help, because even if it does.
Suzie : Break up, I think it gives you a little bit more clarity and assurance that it's much better to get it from someone who has no relation into the situation, because it makes you just feel like you're not going crazy. Cause your friends and family are so biased, and they know you, and they know this other person, and they're obviously gonna share their opinions about these things that they know about where it's like, you should go see someone who maybe just will have a new perspective on it.
Mel: It is perspective. Yeah, it's perspective that isn't somebody who's in your life seeing the facts a bit like what we're doing. We don't know you. We don't know.
Suzie : And we'll get you two to communicate, too.
Mel: We just see the situation because you're telling us the situation. We're just giving an opinion about that. I think it can be helpful. But, you know, look, you have the right to be happy. I think you should go back to that feeling. You have the right to be happy. You have the right to have somebody respect yourself, to respect you. And that's not really been going on here, so I think you should think about that. But, yeah, definitely going to see somebody outside is definitely a good idea.
Suzie : Yeah. And if polyamory is not your thing, then it's not your thing.
Mel: Yeah, exactly.
Suzie : You know, you can't have relationships all over the place.
Mel: No. If you don't want to do it, if you want, you know, some love and just one person, then, yes, you have the right to want that and not all.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: And not have somebody lying to you.
Suzie : Mel gets really upset about the lying part.
Mel: I do. I know.
Suzie : I get it.
Mel: I get very upset about it.
Suzie : I appreciate that.
Mel: Anyway, we wish you the best of luck. We really do.
Suzie : We really do.
Mel: Thank you for writing.
Suzie : Thank you for writing in. If you guys have a thing to want to write into about, you are the man on this side and you want to tell your side of the story, maybe you said something very similar happen to you or you have friends who relationship who you don't know what to say to them. We'd love to hear from you in any case.
Mel: I think that would be good too.
Suzie : Shamerightood.com.
Mel: Yeah. To hear the man's side.
Suzie : So, Mel, today. What's the tea?
Mel: So the tea is this apparently.
Suzie : Yes, it's. You showed me this article.
Mel: Yeah. It's single dad summer.
Suzie : Okay, so what was the end of it? Obviously, it's August.
Mel: Yeah. So we're probably, you know, being a bit late to the thing. But what the hell is that?
Suzie : Well, okay, so let me just read this little excerpt. Okay. In the wake of last year's short King Spring, which is ******* hilarious.
Mel: I've never even heard of that.
Suzie : You're like, what the **** is that? Okay, so short kings are smaller men, let's say, like, 5758. You know, like short kings. But they make money, they treat their women well, and they have good dicks.
Mel: Perfect. We like those short kings.
Suzie : Okay. They're great. And they're kind of overlooked a little bit.
Mel: They. My husband's five nine.
Suzie : Yeah, so, I mean, I don't really say a short king, but, like, do you know what I mean?
Mel: Like, there are a lot of short kings, right?
Suzie : They're, like, hot kind of in their own way. Cause they're, like, still confident.
Mel: But I think a short king is shorter than five eight.
Suzie : Sorry. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like. Cause I like tall guys. I'm always looking for, like, six footers.
Mel: Really?
Suzie : That it's like five eight for me. I'm like, that's a little bit of a short king.
Mel: Although you're short.
Suzie : Yeah, but I need someone who's a, you know.
Mel: Okay, fair enough.
Suzie : Anyways, doesn't matter. I feel like short king is an opinion show.
Mel: King Spring. Okay.
Suzie : Anyways, um, another underappreciated subsection of the male population is stepping into their moment. It's time for a single dad, summer.
Mel: Right. And why summer specifically?
Suzie : Um, that's just when everyone's hot.
Mel: Like hot summer. That's when people are hot.
Suzie : Summer. Everyone's out and about.
Mel: Got it.
Suzie : You're not gonna have, like, a hot dad winter. It just doesn't happen.
Mel: Doesn't make sense.
Suzie : No one's out in the streets.
Mel: Well, not in North America. Because it's two ****** colds.
Suzie : Exactly. Okay, so unattached men with kids are hot property. A recent survey by dating.com found that 60% of single women are open to dating them. Of course, this isn't new. There have always been single dad heartthrobs in movies. Whatever. Whatever. A lot of people like Tom Hanks and sleeping slat as sleeveless in Seattle. Sleepless in Seattle.
Mel: I don't know Tom Hanks. I never liked Tom Hanks.
Suzie : Oh, Jude law is the widower.
Mel: Oh, yeah, Jude law. I've seen the holiday alive.
Suzie : He's so hot.
Mel: Well, I didn't think he was that hot one.
Suzie : No way is he a single dad in real life.
Mel: No, he's married to the 100th woman.
Suzie : I don't know.
Mel: He's got another baby, more babies. He's not single anymore.
Suzie : I'm a fan of hot single dads. Okay, so, like, this person, this is a little quote from it, and it's like someone saying, I got tired of dating adults who are still living like students.
Mel: Fair enough.
Suzie : Right?
Mel: I mean, you're well into that vibe, aren't you?
Suzie : I love ******* dad. Like, I don't know what it is, but, like, they don't have to be an actual dad for me, but, like, they don't have to be, like, an actual father. But I love a daddy, as we know.
Mel: Oh, who looks after you.
Suzie : Yeah. But I think an older guy who is nice.
Mel: Got it. But they're mostly dads.
Suzie : Mostly dads. Unfortunately, a lot of these people have children already. But it also takes the pressure off.
Mel: Of me to be like, you don't have to have children because a lot.
Suzie : Of these guys, since I'm a single gal in the city now, a lot of these kind of like, late thirties, early forties, guys who haven't married yet or, like, haven't we going?
Mel: You're getting younger.
Suzie : I know. It's unfortunate.
Mel: Like, that's interesting.
Suzie : I'm trying to just feel it out.
Mel: You know, being away for a few weeks and you've changed your age group.
Suzie : I'm just trying to feel out what my possibilities are. Do you know what I mean?
Mel: Yeah. Okay.
Suzie : And they're all like, well, do you want kids? And I'm like, literally no. Or like, maybe. But do I want to figure that out right now? No. Maybe give me three years or something.
Mel: Got it.
Suzie : Let's figure it out. And I know that's a hard thing. Cause women who are like me, who want kids, they wanna know that the man wants kids.
Mel: Do they ask you very early on then, do you want children?
Suzie : Um, not exactly. So, like, I'm on dating apps, obviously, now, and, like, it's a question. Well, it's like, it's something. It's not a question. But there's, like, this thing that you can put it. You don't have to put that says if you want children or not. Or it's. They're open to children.
Mel: Interesting.
Suzie : I don't even have it on mine because I'm like, I only have. I don't have children on mine. Just so people know that I'm not a mother, but. Yeah, and like, we. You were talking about before, it's like the same thing where it's like, if the guy has a dog, you know, I mean, you're hoping he'll take care of that dog.
Mel: Yeah, I totally think hot dog, dads. Yeah. Hot dog dogs. Very good. Hot dog. Hot dog dog. Quite the same ring to it.
Suzie : Put that hot dog in my mouth.
Mel: That's just. That's disturbing. Anyway, um, I lost my train of thought.
Suzie : Sorry, babes.
Mel: But I think that if a man. So this article is Bradley. What's his name?
Suzie : Bradley Cooper. If you're on YouTube, you can see he's so hot. Oh, my God.
Mel: And who's famously has this very cute girl, and he's always, like, taking her to school.
Suzie : Oh, really? Who is his ex?
Mel: Oh, some amazingly attractive model who I should know the name of.
Suzie : Oh, Irena Shick or something, however you say her name.
Mel: Tall, very attractive.
Suzie : Right?
Mel: That's her person. Yeah. Beautiful. You know.
Suzie : Got it.
Mel: And they have this very cute little girl, and he's always, like, picking her up or holding her hand, and it's very. So it makes you think. So my take on it is that if you're a younger woman and you're like, he's single and he's looking after this little girl, and he's so cute to her, he's got to be a nice guy. That's what it is. And that he's caring. And men who. And I can vouch for this because, you know, my husband's very caring, very into looking after people. That's his vibe. It's really nice to be taken care of, you know, my husband likes to make sure I'm okay. My daughters are okay. That's his thing is shtick, as it were. And so I think that if you see a man who's very cute with his children and he looks after them and he's nurturing and he's sweet and he's, that that makes him look good and that makes him very appealing because you're like, well, if he's nice to her little, little kid, imagine how nice he is in a relationship. I mean, I think that's the way it works. Yes. I mean, I think you sort of blank out the bit. This guy's got a child and therefore.
Suzie : Has to, you're so one, you're gonna.
Mel: See him less time.
Suzie : One of the things that, I mean.
Mel: Less important, I think. Miss all that bit out.
Suzie : Exactly. I think the one thing, I would.
Mel: Like to state that, yeah.
Suzie : One of the things that, like, women forget about when you're dating a single dad is that you're always gonna be number 2100%. I mean, I would hope so. Like, I hope that they treat their child like number one. Right? Like that's what you want.
Mel: It's a hundred. Like, it's my stepmother. My dad's second wife does not have any children. And it's always been the source of friction between me and her is that she cannot get over the fact I'm his daughter. I'm not his wife, but I'm his daughter. Therefore, as a daughter, it, it's like you're, you'll have a different relationship. And when you're younger, not, not now, but when you're younger. When I was a teenager, obviously you've got to look after that kid and you're paying for that kid to go to school and, and they're important and they're, and some women, especially, if they don't have children, and that's probably the problem if you're going for a sort of young single dad like Bradley Cooper, you don't have children. You don't get it. You don't get, he's like, sorry, I can't see you on Saturday because little Mimi's got a birthday party.
Suzie : Little Mimi.
Mel: And I've got, also, she's sleeping like, I've got her this weekend. Mum hasn't got her, so I can't see you. That's when the reality of hot single dad, you know, it's not as hot.
Suzie : As we think it is.
Mel: No. No. So this would be my advice. Go for hot single dad who's got children who are older.
Suzie : Yes, honey, and I have discovered that too.
Mel: Right so don't go for hot single dad with little kids. That's a disaster. Go for when they're older.
Suzie : But it is hard. Another thing to think about, which is what I do sometimes. Not really. But, you know, some of these dads, most of them are putting their kids through school. They're still paying for their children that aren't children anymore.
Mel: Yeah. Who are very expensive.
Suzie : Who are expensive.
Mel: You can vouch for this.
Suzie : Who are expensive. So, yeah, you do kind of have to either. They have to be rich af for. To afford you and the child and the divorce. Exactly. So there's a lot of money that is not going towards you and him and this relationship.
Mel: I've told this to people so many times, like, remember that if somebody's been married, even if you. I've seen it so many times. Even if you've made a lot of money.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: That's half of that lot of money.
Suzie : Exactly.
Mel: Which then might not be that much. I mean, you have to literally be Jay Z for this to not make any difference. Like, most people who are making a lot of money, it makes a difference because you've got to have two households, two blah, blah, blah. And, you know, some of these, you know, if the wife didn't work, you know, they make, they're getting a lot a month.
Suzie : And here's all the other thing I'll say about the ex wife and stuff like that, is that, like, if they have a bad relationship with their ex wife, that is a telltale sign that you are probably gonna be next. Do you know what I mean?
Mel: Yeah, I mean, I've certainly seen that. Like, I know somebody off the top of my head where that happened. Yeah. And this guy I know, he, his wife, she's mad and they had three kids, and he kind of. She didn't work and he had to pay her off. And then he married his next wife, who didn't have kids, and she just could not, could not get it in her head why he would spend so much time. And he lived in a different country to his ex wife, so when his kids were there, they were always there, and she just couldn't handle it. Right. And they ended up getting divorced, but, yeah. And I think he lied to his second wife as much as he's lying to his first wife, and then he's now got another wife. So the way. Oh, my God. But, yeah, I mean, it is not a good.
Suzie : Yeah, it's not a good sign. Like, obviously, there's situations that are all different, 100%, but I think there is that thing where it's like, if they've treated. If they respect their ex, still, it's the mother of their children.
Mel: Yeah. Then unless she's dark, raving mad. So I can think of another friend where he's a really nice guy. She's dark, raving mad, and his new wife is really lovely, and he just, for whatever reason, and he knows she's nuts, and he does his best, but she's nuts. And she cries and creates all sorts of problems. But. So, you know, sometimes you get yourself into these situations. Yeah. And you hope.
Suzie : You hope not, but it just happens.
Mel: It does. It really does. But, yeah, hot dad, single dad summer. I'm reading the thing because, listen, single dad summer. There's no hot. I'm confusing hot girl summer or single dad summer. It's single dad summer. We're just assuming that dad is hot.
Suzie : They better be hot.
Mel: I mean, it doesn't really work. Who's not hot?
Suzie : Yeah. It doesn't have.
Mel: He's either gonna be hot or rich. I mean, yeah, both is better. Both is definitely better.
Suzie : Both is better. I personally big fan of the hot dads, and, you know, I'm not looking to be step mommy, but I'd like to have that kind. It's just. It's nice because they're usually nice. Like, dads are nice. They know they. If they have daughters, especially. There's something about that. They're, like, kind of understand women a little bit more because they've had to. And it's not just like a wife kind of thing, an ex wife, for whatever reason, they're just a little bit nicer.
Mel: Oh, it's true.
Suzie : They're more understanding. They're more patient. 100% a huge fan of single dads.
Mel: Wow. Okay. But the children have to be grown up.
Suzie : The children have to be. For me, personally, I'm not ready to be a stepmom in the sense of, like, even, like, even, like teenagers because I feel like they ******* hate you. And I'm like, why?
Mel: Oh, they will hate you.
Suzie : Right. So, like, why would I put myself through that?
Mel: I wouldn't. Why would I do that if I were you?
Suzie : Why?
Mel: Wow. Yeah. Unless you really, really. This man.
Suzie : It's not worth it.
Mel: Don't do it.
Suzie : Not worth it for me.
Mel: No.
Suzie : So I've decided not to. But adult children, different. Get it going. ****, yeah.
Mel: Wow. A fug.
Suzie : Yeah.
Mel: A fug. Yeah.
Suzie : Jerk that up for me.
Mel: Well, there we go. And that's. That's our tea. Yeah. Let me know what you guys think.
Suzie : We want to know, if you guys are a single dad, you're looking to mingle, hit me up. But otherwise, everyone else can, you know, let us know if you're dating a single dad. Been a good experience or not. Or. Yeah. If you're a single mom, too, let us know that experience of that, too. Are single moms as hot as single dads? No, they're not, which is so upsetting.
Mel: It's so rude.
Suzie : So sad because they care about their children more and they have less time.
Mel: Rude. Yeah. And men don't. Yeah, men don't want that. Yeah. Yeah. And then there's all sorts of bodies of change.
Suzie : There's always horrible things that come with.
Mel: It's the thing that goes through their head about what's happened downstairs.
Suzie : Well, it's an obvious thing that we think about. Everyone thinks about. No one wants to talk about whether.
Mel: The whole has expanded or not. What's. Yeah.
Suzie : Yeah. Maybe that's for another episode, guys.
Mel: You'll have to. That's a big, big one. But anyway, so that's that really.
Suzie : Anyways, yeah. Single dad summer. Ready for it?
Mel: Yeah, I'm good. I'll leave it to you. Yeah.
Suzie : Thanks, babes. Bye. Sharing my truth pod is so excited to partner with vibr8tor.com, where the a in vibrator is the number eight. This is an extremely exciting, exclusive code where no other podcast has it. If you go to vibr8tor.com right now, use the code MS 15. That's MS 15. You can now get 15% off anything in store that's any sex toys for you, your partner, your neighbor, your mom. We don't judge. We don't care. Get it? Now go to the link in our bio, put in the code and get jiggy with it.
Mel: Thanks so much for listening. Please rate and review this podcast and follow us on social at @sharingmytruthpod and leave us a voicemail on our website, sharingmytruth.com, to share your stories and experiences with us. We'll see you next time. Bye bye.
Suzie : Three, two, one.